Herr Most Mostly Mouth
Herr Most, the noted
New York anarchist, who should have been hung or deported many years
ago for the seeds of sedition sown by him, has been heard from again.
He denounces Senator Hoar’s suggestion that all anarchists be sent
to some island of the far Pacific, there to work out their own ideas
of irresponsibility and confusion, in which everybody would be for
himself and damned be all government for anybody. Most declares
that none would be sent except those well known, and that they are
but a few among many, and that he would probably be the first man
bounced, in which event he would logically be king of the island.
As anarchists do not believe in kings, or other heads of government,
old King Most would be assassinated, instanter [sic], by
some convert to his own preachings. And there would be no monument
erected to Most’s memory, as that would cost money, and anarchists
have no use for labor, which is necessary to the production of money.
No, Mr. Most couldn’t be king. That which, however, would worry
Mr. Most most would be the fact that he could not dead-beat a living
by shooting off his mouth. The safer place for Mr. Most, safer from
having his worthless hide punctured by an anarchist assassin’s knife,
and safer for all honest people, is the cell of the prison in which
he is now confined for spouting the treason which led up to the
murder of our lamented president, that incorruptible official, that
pure and noble man, that patriotic American, William McKinley, the
victim of anarchism.